Craving Pleasure Causes Conflict

James 4:1-3 Where do conflicts and quarrels among you come from? Don’t they come from your cravings for pleasure, which are at war in the parts of your body? 2 You want something but do not get it, so you murder. You desire something but cannot obtain it, so you quarrel and fight. You do not have because you do not ask. 3 You ask, and yet do not receive, because you ask wrongly, so that you may spend it on what gives you pleasure.

If you put two kids in a room with only one toy or one piece of candy, what will you get? You’ll get the same result that we saw on the nightly news during the COVID lockdown when otherwise mild-mannered adults got into shouting matches and fistfights over the last remaining rolls of toilet paper or can of baked beans. Why all the ruckus? In a word: hedonism. Hedonism is a philosophy that proposes that the best and most fulfilling life is the one directed towards pleasure. This is the person who says, "If it feels good, do it!" and "Don't let anything or anyone stand in the way of your happiness!" While incredibly self-focused, inherently subjective, and terribly nearsighted, the hedonistic outlook is the driving force behind many people's daily decisions, and it thrives in our materialistic, buy now pay later, instant gratification culture.

But in truth hedonism owes its popularity to the fact that it speaks the same language as our sinful nature. The flesh within each of us contends, "I'm most important! MY desires and MY happiness need to be fulfilled before anyone else's." Evolutionists take this innate drive for self-preservation to its rational brutal conclusion with their mantra of "survival of the fittest." If there's only one loaf of bread left on the store shelf and two people reach for it, it's both expected and morally acceptable for the one who is quickest, strongest, or meanest to take it out the door. So much for compromise and compassion, I guess. But all that evolution has done is normalize and give a gimmicky name to a problem that is as old as humanity. James notes that the unbridled quest to fulfill one's pleasures is the root cause of envy, strife, conflict, and murder, which are present not only in the unbelieving world around but also “warring in the parts of YOUR body”—that is within you and me—his Christian readers.  

Clearly God cannot reward a hedonistic mindset among us because it is both sinfully self-serving, and it makes pleasure into one’s idol. For these reasons, we should not be surprised when our pleasure-seeking prayers go unanswered. Otherwise, God would be encouraging rotten motives and promoting our own self-destruction. It would be like a teenager asking a parent for money to spend on drugs or alcohol or wondering if they could borrow the car to go street racing. No parent who loves their child would fork over $20 or hand them the keys! Much less could God, our heavenly Father, who only gives good gifts to his children (cf. James 1:17; Matt. 7:11), ever bring himself to do the same, no matter how we might beg and kick and scream!  

In his infinite grace and wisdom, God knows perfectly well when and which of our desires to leave unfulfilled. He does this so that with James here and King Solomon in Ecclesiastes we would discover just how fleeting and empty worldly pleasures are (cf. Eccl. 2:1ff). Thankfully, our Father always has the long-game in mind. He intends for us to find our deepest desire and the fulfillment of our purpose, dreams, and eternal hopes in him alone. As St. Augustine once wrote, “You have made us, O Lord, for yourself, and our hearts are restless until they rest in you.” In this way God nudges our faith towards the same attitude that was exhibited by Jesus Christ and drove him to be our sinless substitute. The Messiah says in the Psalms, “I desire to do your will, O my God; your law is within my heart” (Psalm 40:8). Although he was tempted in every way, just as we are (cf. Heb. 4:15), Jesus was not pulled into sin by the pursuit of earthly pleasures because he knew the joy and fullness that was awaiting him in heaven. We too have eternal joys being prepared by Jesus for us, so we can put our current cravings on ice and make our Father’s will our life’s purpose and purest pleasure.   

For Personal Reflection:

1.) The next time you get into an argument or sense a conflict coming on, pause to examine your own underlying motives. Is it simply another instance of wanting what you want for yourself? Confess it to the Lord, and apologize to your adversary. Then strive together for God’s will and your neighbor’s good.   

2.) Take note of what pleasures you do you find particularly enticing and difficult to resist and go to God acknowledging the pull they have on you. Seek his strength and the companionship of other caring Christians in this fight.   

Prayer: Lord Jesus Christ, you refused every worldly pleasure that could lure you from fulfilling your mission to live a selfless, God-centered life to save me. Forgive my envy, anger, and fights that arise from the vain pursuit of pleasure embedded within my sinful flesh. Keep my eyes fixed on the heaven you have won so that doing your Father’s will is always my heart’s delight. Amen.